On Turning 40
On Turning 40: In Every Season, He is There
We are entering into one of my favorite seasons and times of the year, Fall. There is something so beautiful about witnessing the leaves change from a dazzling, bright and shining green, transforming into breathtaking colors of yellow, orange and fiery red. Just as the the Summer brings sunshine, warmth, and flowers that seem to burst forth with life and vibrant colors, the Fall brings cool and crisp days, delicious smells of mouthwatering cinnamon and pumpkin treats, and a world that seems to be hand painted with creativity and love. In each different season of Winter, Spring, Summer and Fall, I see Gods’ amazing handiwork and creation, and stand in awe of His majesty. Just as the Lord has made different seasons for His amazing creation, He too has made our lives to have and experience different seasons.
This year I am stepping into another season in life. This year I will be turning 40. Yes, Lordy Lordy, I’m almost 40! (That’s just a little sing song saying my parents use to say when I was young, and I couldn’t wait to sing this when my time came to be 40! (Oh to be a child again and oblivious to how aging really works!) As I write this, I am looking back on these “seasons” of my life. Some seeming like moments of endless eternity, and some like sand slipping too quickly through my fingers, I reflect and rejoice in these times that I have had the honor to experience in my 40 years of life. My childhood, my teenage years, my adult years, marriage, motherhood, homeschooling. In each of these seasons, these moments of time, each one different and unique, I have experienced laughter, joy, heartbreak, heartache, gratitude, growth, grace, wisdom, mercy, friendship, peace, love, and so much more that mere paper can not contain. I know during my entire life and in every season, my Father God has been with me through it all, and is present in every moment.
He was with me when I was a little girl living out in the freedom of the country, my dad and I laying under a blanket of stars on our long driveway with our bicycles positioned over us as we “pedaled through the stars” in the night sky, singing songs together and traveling the star lit Heavens. Or, when my childhood best friend and my mom and I laid our ears down to the soft green grass one summer evening, listening with all our might for the grass to grow, time feeling like it was suspended and nothing else in the world mattered at that very moment. He was with me on that breezy day in April when I took my husbands hand and made a promise by saying “ I do”. He was ever present and at the center of each one of my 5 beautiful babies births, Him stirring in my husband and I’s hearts, which burst and overflow with the love and joy of the Lord! He was there in the hospital room where I delivered my beautiful daughter Joy, whom was born still during my 7th month of pregnancy. He was there with my sisters on that day in that delivery room, their gentle hands covering me in love and prayer, tears flowing from all of our eyes. And in that same delivery room, Jesus shone where my dad sat at my hospital bedside while he lifted and strengthened me by reading scripture, reminding me of Gods love and promises, while waiting for my sweet baby Joy to arrive. God was in the very moment when Joy took her last breath and kicked her last kick in my belly, and He never left when she was delivered into this world and into my arms, a strange feeling of excitement, yet my heart aching and longing to hear her beautiful new born baby cry, which never came. He filled the room where my mom was the first to hold my stillborn daughter, such love and tenderness in her eyes, and in her heart. I’ll never forget how my breaking heart sang out with the simple yet heartfelt act of my big brother bringing me flowers, as I was about to embark on the hardest journey I’ve ever had to endure. And even still, He was there when my brother in law visited the next morning to bring a bit of sweetness into our day by surprising us with some of the most delicious donuts we ever had enjoyed, sprinkles and all.
He was there and He is there, and through His promise, He will remain there in these moments, and every other moment that I am blessed with breath, and life. I have so many more memories, some sweet and tender, some earth shattering and heart wrenching, all of these which belong to God. In every moment, in every season, He is there. He created these very times! With every heartbeat, He does reign. In every changing season, He is the ever present constant that brings everlasting hope, joy, and unconditional love. I thank God for all of these moments in time, even the hardest of times, and I praise Him with all my heart. I know that with the rest of the time that God gifts me with here on Earth, and through every season that we enter into, He is and always will be my rock, my shield, my strength, my joy, my hope, my victory, He is my everything.
In each changing season of your life, will you invite God to fill every moment to overflow with Him? Will you praise Him in every season? Do you thank God for each moment, even when it’s hard to imagine the next one? My prayer for you is that you too find Him and embrace Him in every season and in each precious moment, because it’s the moments that make up the seasons in your life.
Melissa Vigil
" Some trust in their war chariots and others in their horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God."
